By Zoe Mardiks, IJN intern
“You have a choice; either it consumes you and becomes bad, or it consumes you and brings you to do something else. And the reality is, we’re never going to heal. We’re never going to move past this. We’re learning to live with sadness and find joy again, and part of that is carrying on the good that Ellie would do, and it does mean a lot to us.”
This is Josh Berg’s response to the death of Ellie Berg, age six, his and his wife Carly’s only child. She died in a tragic accident on November 19, 2023, when a tree struck her while she was playing in her backyard in Boulder.
In a remarkable display of strength following the tragic loss, the Bergs made the conscious decision to use Ellie’s passing as a force for good. They created the “Be Like Ellie” Foundation.
From giving grants to Jewish organizations, spreading gratitude by handing out roses on the street, and going into schools to talk about not bullying and standing up for others.
Josh Berg says, “Ellie had a heart of gold. She always went out of her way to spread kindness to everyone, from people at the grocery store to her classmates.
While attending the JCC in Boulder, Ellie’s teachers described her as a light of positivity. Her teachers said it almost felt like another teacher was in the room. She would assist other students with putting a jacket on or lending a shoulder to cry on.
“As parents, we did our best to instill the importance of being a good person. It just takes a simple act of saying, ‘Hey, how are you doing today?’ Get somebody to completely change the course of what they were going to do,” says Berg.
The foundation has a website, www.belikeellie.com, and social media accounts highlighting Ellie’s story and where the money is being used.
The foundation will host an event in Boulder at the Fox Theater, Sept. 21, a music show featuring notable bands that Ellie loved. All ticket sales will go to the foundation.
Music was a significant part of Ellie’s life from an early age. At birth, the Bergs played all types of music for Ellie; it was important for her to understand and appreciate good music.
Ellie’s favorite band was Phish and she even had a dog that she named Mango after her favorite song. For Chanukah, she asked for a band-signed CD.
With Phish being a big part of Ellie’s upbringing, and the family being fans, the Bergs decided to attend a Phish show in Mexico.
To their surprise, something incredible was awaiting them there. On a Phish website forum, one of the Bergs’ friends had posted asking whether anyone could help to have one of Ellie’s favorite songs, “The Mango Song,” played at the concert. The post helped start the hashtag #MangosForEllie, which was trending across social media and the Phish community.
This community has since become a source of comfort and healing for the Bergs.
The Bergs and their friends were not hopeful that someone would actually see their post and bring it to the band. But sure enough, they did. The Bergs said they could feel Ellie’s presence at the concert.
“I grabbed Carly, and I was standing directly behind her, holding her. We just listened all the time and cried; it was a very magical moment. Trey (lead guitarist from Phish) was very choked up. It was beautiful,” recalls Berg.
The band is not known for making dedications in its shows, but according to Berg, Ellie’s voice and community were loud enough to touch their hearts.
“We are the luckiest and unluckiest people in the world,” says Josh Berg, his voice filled with gratitude and sorrow.
“We’re so lucky that Ellie was our exceptional child, and we’re also beyond unlucky that something like this can happen.”
Josh and Carly persevere through tough times, keeping Ellie’s name and spirit alive through the foundation’s acts of kindness and spreading joy during times of darkness.
For more information about the music event in September: https://tinyurl.com/3umw4csj
© IJN 2024